haha. 1 more to do list to update. i wanna gain weight till 75kg. KNN i sit mrt beside all the guys i realise i damn small size la. = (

In the past nat will still say, wa brother i didn't realise u so big size. now i sit wif her i think we same size la. hhahaha..

well have to eat more, sleep more and TRAIN more liao. hahaha

Weird weird de feeling leh. in state of confusion. hai, dono why oso, things changes so fast something like a blink of an eye. frens changes, habits changes, thinking changes, feeling changes, word changes, attitude changes, things around me change. It's a changing world i guess. humans are so adaptable that we can adapt to changes around us fast. and i mean FAST.

i changed too. ta's wat my bros tell me. well i hope it's for the better. i HOPE la. haha.

FAN FAN FAN
CONFUSE CONFUSE CONFUSE
LUAN LUAN LUAN

i'll be going away. haha to some kawlong thingy. haha. don even know how to spell. Wif my da lao po bro and aunty and uncle. haha. hope it would be fun.

As usual, mom nag the whole nite worrying. she forgot her sons are already 20 & 22. but we are still babies to our mother. haha.when i'm back, i'll start my to do list. haha.

i hope i could understand how u feel, but my bad, i couldn't. but i promise things will stop. thinking will stop. tests are near, study hard and well ppl! JIA YOU! = )

Live life wif no regrets. tis is wat i always tell others. becoz my life is full of regrets. i can't change them but i'm trying to accept them. If u wanna screw things up, screw it up nicely. It's true u know, enjoy the process of screwing things. since it's already screwed. haha. Today i met tis guy, a guy ta shock my life. he said the same things like me, "ALL EYES ON ME PLEASE". he's me role modern man. seriously, his crowd control damn good la. even wif small kids. He said it wif power and u can sense it, all eyes were really on him. i wonder did i had that power during sportcamp everytime i said that.

Recap of Sportcamp 1st-4th

1st
Well i went in as a shy freshies. so low profile so dumb looking guys. all the OPEN CLOSE game, BANG BANG BANG & HOW MANY MEI MEI JUMP OVER THE WALL, i'm the slowest to guess it rite. haha. no talent. Was onli hyper during camp fire nite. By then i already knew mud. He and Hadi same OBS course as me. they were in the camp too. Mud of course was well known. haha. he's really funny. Enjoyed my camp fire, den came the last day. before everyone goes we sat down and DEBIFY.! the most touching debify i ever had. everyone cried. serious, all becoz tis guy nickname 'MEE POK' he started tearing. OMG our bond so close ta time. haha. Den i form happy square. 3 beauty and 1 beast. haha. I was name HEHEHEHE, Vicole LALALALA, Fanny HAHAHAHA & Amily HOHOHOHO. Miss them lots man.

2nd
Became a GL. remember 1st day of training i offended mi mi yan liao. i asked him can he be poilte to at least look at us and talk. haha. he was threw water on me la. KNN kanna. haha. we were grp 6 den i and esther ask him go middle shout GRP 6 6 SEX SEX SEX, haha den say will join him. he was doubtful of wat we said and did it. haha. we really left him alone to shout la. so funny. GL was tough, preparing things remembering names. haha. i didn't remember any coz i was bad wif names. My grp know la, my spell really cannot make it. haha. GL camp go town run ard i DAMN PS la. SHY LIKE SHIT, they still tot i act onli, haha. My grp gals so enthu i can't spoil them mood so i played along lo. didn't care if i see my fren la. haha. throw face jiu throw lo. haha. Anyway had fun can liao rite. haha. so funny la, hydrus became joke of the day. Den went to wen for confident walk and all. Came back sch was praise to be a gd joker. haha. Coz i always act like WAN REN FU coz my stupid hair. haha. Actual camp was sad coz 1st day half my grp ppl book out coz of FOC ppl coming there to ask them book out. i damn FUCK UP. haha. ALL the GLs cried. But we joined ourselves and put up a nice camp and ending. haha.

3rd
going back as a helper. was jealous wif the GLs because they had a wonderful freshies. haha coz FOC was after Sportcamp. haha. Going around disturbing ppl. leading ppl to place and i had fun. haha. cover them asking them listen to me onli, asking them who the like or dislike in the grp. haha PURE FUN la. haha.

4th
my very LAST sport camp as a NP students. haha. 1st day went in all tot i freshies coz i wear all black. DUMB dono how to read ar, Ngee Ann Canoing Team. haha. end up all bring me to Misha. haha, took me the 2nd day to call it rite. YUP everyone knows my english suck by then. But i was proud coz i got B3 for english. haha. den i walked ard actually not to see freshies but to see GLs. see got familiar faces anot. not bad la got some i know. haha. then got alot know me but i forgot them. = x sry ar old man liao forgetful. haha. was abit we didn't get to go KALLANG to try dragonboat, tis year they so shuang la. haha. go there. well 1st was to prepare item for camp fire, end up all go swim den too tired. haha. but we old bird, last min learn oso very nice. ahha. BUt i already forgot how to dance unless 1 can lead me. = x Oh i forgot, last yr sportcamp the maze i oso got help to think de. haha. tis yr i change abit and it went well. i heard alot ppl kanna scare. haha. COOL rite. i shld go open GHOST HSE LIAO. haha. tis yr last year liao cannot hold back anymore, was glad jia zhi became a CC. last yr can tell me wanna get involve more. haha. U got nothing to learn from me la JIA ZHI, i oso anyhow lead de. coz my MOTOR IS IF I SCREW THINGS UP I MAKE SURE I SCREW THEM UP NICELY. haha. Last day kanna rap, suddenly miss my video when i was a GL. last day i oso kanna rape and i mean RAPE BIG TIME oki, not frm the side but the middle oki. haha. don wanna explain any furture u all can imagine the pain la. haha.

Every year i joined i go in wif r/s problem, 1st&2nd xiao zhu, 3rd yun and 4th Yi. they helps me to onli remember thing i shld remember and everytime a camp ends something was learned and realised. think so much oso like ta, don think oso like ta. so don think better. haha. life will be happier. it's true. ANYWAY i LOVE SPORTCAMP. haha.

Still not sleeping for me i guess.
TIME: 2.20am

Anyway, i've not been going out lately. why? Becoz i keep going to different house to play MAHJONG.! i wonder who is the smart one who invented this game. haha, been losting and winning too. But if i were to calculate, i'm still losing quite abit. haha.

Oki 1st thing 1st, i play is not becoz i'm addicted to gambling. My bros knows i used to hate it alot even thou i still play. I played is becoz it's really fun. But, i still didn't manage to master the beauty of tis game. GUARDING!!! haha. trying to learn, maybe ta's why i'm losing. haha. well i might be slow be no choice. haha. don worry, i'll onli get addicted to gamble if GOD destory all the sports and games in the world. haha. Been coming home at 9 10 plus in the morning. i guess my mom miss me alot, always tried to talk to me. haha. i miss her too.

Tis whole month i'm so into myself. doing thing my way, doing thing i like, i forgot someone, someone whom muz not be forgotten. that is GOD. Well, when was the last time i mention him, all i remember, it's not tis week. Hai, there's still so many things i wanna do, coaching license, bike TP, fittness, movies, gathering and so many so many. well i'm not managing my time well. so many last min programmes.

But i think comes june i pack myself wif lots of thing before i serve my country.

1st Malaysia wif Da lao po and aunty wendy
2nd I'll go sign up for coaching
3rd Malaysia again, CHURCH CAMP ( i miss camps )
4th Bike TP
5th NP graudation cum DND
6th NS preparation
7th gathering wif all my bros, frens and love ones
8th going to see xin xin ( i hope so )

so many things but only 1 me. Went to watch -=NEXT=- Cage could turn into so many ppl la. everyone in the show were like WA!!!! hahaha. so funny. he's still 1 of my favourite actor. can onli act nice guy. haha. i onli remember tis saying.
LIFE SHOULD BE FULL OF SURPRISES
well indeed, if u can see ur future, wat's the point of living den. we get happy, sad, hurt and crazy as time goes by. ta makes our living worth while and contented.

Xiong still knows me well. if u r reading, YA la got someone la. haha. but i dono how to explain to u. haha. meet up liao den tell u again. but u got bf liao, abit difficult. haha.

Past few days, msg was weird. A weird feeling, u can sense it by reading urself. maybe i keep stressing the word LIKE. Why things have to happen tis way. i mean why we humans have to react like ta when somethings are said. I already confessed. if u really wanna think, jus think do u have feelings for me, yes, den stop thinking, let me be nice to u, to know u better. if no, den stop thinking still. treat me as a fren. = ) i dono need ur feelings in return. i wouldn't fall deeper for u becoz no point. oki? END OF DAY, jus STOP THINKING and DON APOLOGISE.

can't be together, is it so hard to be frens again? this is wat everyone says. but i always don agree, becoz i always fren fren back wif the ones i love. haha. As long as i know they are happy, i'm happy. same goes for u. knowing things turn out like ta for u, it makes it hard for me to face u. jus wanna know u r happy. Seeing u happy makes me happier. = ) tis saying is not to act wei da or wat but i find it true and seriously i felt ta way. Let nature take it course wouldn't it be better? Time will tell. time not onli heals, it makes wonders and it proves everything, be it truth or fake. i dono where my courage come from but i jus don wanna hide my feelings anymore.

like jiu like, don like jiu don like. IZ saying ( haha IZ = MAN ) well i'm tired, very tired. but still have to train my fittness and all. been playing bball, haha, i'm loving it still! haha. take care hor u. keep smiling la. BIG BIG DE SMILE = )

Well, jus had my supper.

Suppose to watch princeless today but went i got there i miss the timing. hai didn't get the chance to watch. IZ and I called Nat, Ming, Bird, Yi, Alwin and B for steamboat dinner. Kai was mad at me becoz i didn't tp his reply. my bad and i'm sorry. He was kind. he forgive me liao. haha.

After dinner we walked to nat and B's office to use their toilet. haha. so lame rite. it was near their office anyway and it was cleaner. haha. Took cab to Kai's place for Mahjong again. Been playing lately. not bad been winning but yet to win back wat i lost. didn't feel good since sunday. i dono why oso. Kai's know me well, IZ too. they read my mind and heart. luckily i did talk to them.

Hai, wat am i thinking lately. wat do i really want. Kai say it's simple, u want it u go for it, if not jus give up. i oso dono wat i'm scare for. falling again? haha it's already been broken so many times why now? is not i'll feel hurt is i'm scare of hurting others. Well let nature takes its course. wat is meant to be it was meant to be. i'm feeling better now. Ride kai's bike was good. had fun too. thanks man even tho u didn't really want to lend me the bike.

I'm tired, so tired ta now my days jus like ta.

life before,

waking up at 7
prepare myself for work
dad fetch mom and i to work
work and waited for lunch time
end lunch
after 2 start praying time pass faster
after 3 feel sleepy
after 4 motive myself saying an hour half more to go
after 530 time pass like there's lots of tomorrow
Back home play game
before 1 sleep

next day the same things goes over and over again. = life hai. hhahahaha

life now,

wake up abt 10 plus morning
slack on bed
play game
sleep again
play game
go out end whoever is meeting me
reach home is already 5 plus in the morning

life now, not fixed, onli ate 1 meal a day. hahaha.

i missed sch life. i missed break time. and i can't believe wat i'm going to say, i missed exams.! and i mean i missed it alot!

Mother's Day = Women of mylife!!!

Well well well, Happy Mother's Day!

women of my life plays an important role in my life. haha. they are the ones who showed me care and love in my life. they are,

My grandma (Da lao Po) and MOM (Xiao Lao Po)
haha, i love them both. I'll onli put my gf as the 3rd most love women in my life coz the 1st and 2ns place already taken up. haha. We went thro alot together, cried together, eat together, worked together and we talked our hearts out together. they are not jus my grandma and mom but they were my frens, my closest fren. i tell almost everything to them making sure they know wat's happening in my life. haha. they provide love care and MONEY for me.. Wahahaha.

Aunties
My aunties all took care of me when i was young. i was like a prince and everyone have to make me happy at ta time. haha. u all know i love u. = )

MAMA & jie jie
Mama ( my nanny) and jie jie. haha. watch me grow up since young. now jie jie got 3 beautiful daughters. haha. i'm their god brother le. haha. thanks for the love shower upon me. hahaha.

Siti & shahira
They were my best buddy in sec sch, 4 yrs same class. i miss them. we always had fun in class together. we laff we joke we play we get jealous we fought we quarrel too. haha. i miss them and i love them too! haha.

Phyo & Winnie
We got close coz of clara. when i was wif her, u guys was there to solve our pro if we ever quarrel. then now we go out eat talk andd laff too! haha. Once again thanks for the bday surprise. haha. Love u guys too!

Nat & B
haha. Bitches they are. i love the even more. We insult one another, push one another, hit and punch one another. so fun to see them in pain la. wahahaha. now no more liao. = ( B turning 21 lao liao can't handle anymore. WAHAHA. nat, she hits like a pussy now. haha. but poly life wifout u both, esp nat, i think i dono repeat how many modules la. haha. miss stduying session wif u la. u bitch la. haha.

My class gals
haha. thanks for making my poly wif so many celebrations. haha. i miss all the insult and LOUD LAUGDTHER produce by u ppl. haha. BTW my class well known for loud laffing. but always i kanna. coz i class rep. hai. haha. but it was fun.. hahaha. stay cheerful gals.

All my exs
Well, ppl who knows me well, i still care for them. thanks for the love and care. hope u all are doing well. well hearing everyone is doing better off wifout me, i felt kinda happy for them. Ppl always say, if u love her, let her go. haha. i guess i really loved them before. To JY, sorry it's just ta something was missing in our relationship. u tried so hard to make me love u but i didn't. i pray and hope someone better out there knows how to deserve u better.


Well, the above are those who showed me care and love so much. and they are and were the women of my life...! Happy Mother's Day!! hahaha. if u r not a mother still, still i wish u all HAppY Mother'S Day!! hhahaha.

Bros, when Father's Day come, i'll wish u all de. haha. my life is not onli have gals. my Gays play important roles too! hahaha.

Wao.... time pass really fast when i'm slacking. haha. i guess it wouldn't last long so i have to find myself a very part time job. haha. my fren say go MIAO SIAO. haha. lame but funny. haha.

Today i went running in the afternoon. was it running or jogging. haha. i can't tell. all i know is my stamina really suck. after 6 rounds (2.4km) i'm like out of breath. Anyway, i came home feeling weird on my knee. didn't realise it was painful until i started doing some housework. haha. HOUSEWORK!!! helping my mom yo keep the house clean. it was went i dou down went i heard a 'crack' sound. and i was like OUCH!! haha. Bad knee now, it's uncomfortable but i'm trying hard not to think abt it. if i keep thinking, i'm surely going to do something to my own knee. haha. Just got recovered from a bad stomach ach, fever plus headach. now injure knee. once a person bad luck is all the way de i guess. haha. Anyway, my mom loves me so much, haha i mean my xiao lao po, coz i did housework for her. haha. sweep the WHOLE house up and down, I used to sweep my old house floor too, which is much bigger than here. haha. those who knows me long enough they know what i meant. When i was young i used to play penalty shootout at the hall. haha. I miss my old hse. Bros keep asking wen i moving, u guys know i dono how to ans ta qns de, still ask. hahaa. i always reply soon soon soon. i belong to the WEST, WEST of singapore. haha. i'm a JURONG KID..! WESTSIDE STORY. haha. MOM's fav 5566 show. LOL.

Been watching movies lately, with who? me, myself, cnsr, Clemence, Sheng Rong and Mr Ng. haha. Spiderman 3 was good, lots of fighting parts touching too.! too many died. Fracture was Great and beyond 2 thumbs up. 200 pound beauty, like the title, the show was a BEAUTY.! haha. i watched twice in the cinema which twice i almost cried during the last part. the fact is i jus got hm frm the show. haha. watched fracture twice too! haha.

If my class gals go watch, they maybe can understand why i always so direct to them and so call 'insult' them. U guys have to know tis, at 1st they think they are fat and ugly and when i say them, they will get affected by. haha. Coz i say them fat la, tis la ta la. Now, i say them, they don even feel a thing and they even joke abt it. Ta's the confidences they have. ahaha. I love my class gals, they the BEST!! all the aunties in my class. i think the miss calling me names. haha. Yup self confident is all ta matters. Coz you life for urself and not for others. why live in others shadow when others wanna be like you (if u've got the confident) = ) To Gals who thinks ta they are fat!! so wat u r fat? u will still be loved!! = ) i'm sure GOD is very fair, and tent to give ppl more good points than bad rite? hahaha.

Tml canoe training, it's been long but need to go back train wif them abit. haha.

Yawn!!!! nite = )